I don't care if this makes me a cougar: Ryan Petry is fricking adorable.
Subject: pro mountain biker Ryan Petry
Materials used: toasted almond flour (inspired by his love of Barney Butter)
Epic Beard Men
Wishing I was headed to the UK for the multitude of Epic Beard Men shows this month!
Subjects: hip hop artists Sage Francis and B. Dolan
Materials used: dried cranberries
On to the Olympics!
Monday morning DS: What's that made out of? Kittel's tears?
Subject: pro cyclist Mark Cavendish
Materials used: digestive biscuits
Tour de France 2016: Stages 15-21
Stage 15:
Monday Morning DS: le Bore de France.
Stage 16:
Monday Morning DS: Someone remind Kristoff you're supposed to bike throw at the line, not after. Fucking noob.
Stage 17:
Monday Morning DS: Teejay should change his name to Levi.
Stage 18:
Monday Morning DS: I didn't even know Haimar Zubeldia was still racing.
Stage 19:
Monday Morning DS: Wout Poels the real MVP.
Stage 20:
Monday Morning DS: Fuck this Tour.
Stage 21:
Monday Morning DS: Kittel's poverty gear = three mechanicals LOL. #iamspecialized
Tour de France 2016: Stages 8-14
Stage 8:
Monday Morning DS: New respect for Froome for smacking the fuck out of that fat banana looking dude.
Stage 9:
Monday Morning DS: If Dan Martin ate Chris Froome, he'd still be skinnier than Sagan.
Stage 10:
Monday Morning DS: Sagan gonna Sagan.
Stage 11:
Monday Morning DS: "Shit happens, at least I didn't get beaten, that's the positive we can take home." That's a real Cav quote from today. Translation, "bro, at least I didn't lose."
Stage 12:
Monday Morning DS: Sidi gonna start making running shoes now.
Stage 13:
Monday Morning DS: Cancellara lost to Quintana. Def time to hang it up.
Stage 14:
Monday Morning DS: Kittel, that fat fuck.
Tour de France 2016: Stages 1-7
If you don't follow me on Instagram, I've been making collage postcards for every stage of the Tour, combined with commentary from the infamous Monday Morning DS. Here's the first week, in full!
Stage 1:
Stage 2:
Monday Morning DS: Yo, Sagan finally won something.
Stage 3:
Monday Morning DS: Kittel? Fuck Kittel. Only thing Kittel is going to win is another year in Shimano shoes.
Stage 4:
Monday Morning DS: Wow Kittel won. Wowowowowow. Must be 'cause he's on Sidis now.
Stage 5:
Monday Morning DS: You'd think Greg Van Avermaet would fix his shitty fucking teeth.
Stage 6:
Monday Morning DS: Goddamn, Nike, sell me those fucking shoes already!
Stage 7:
Monday Morning DS: Did Nibali even train for this Tour?