Tour de France 2017: Stages 15-21

Stage 15:

Monday Morning DS: Landa, you da real MVP.

stage 15

Stage 16:

Monday Morning DS: Matthews winning all the Sagan stages.

stage 16

Stage 17:


stage 17

Stage 18:

Monday Morning DS: Bardet - get yellow or die tryin.

stage 18

Stage 19:

Monday Morning DS: EBH getting laid tonight for the first time in six years.

stage 19

Stage 20:

Monday Morning DS: OJ's parole hearing was more interesting than this Tour.

stage 20

Stage 21:

Monday Morning DS: Greipel ROFL. Everyone is RIP and he still can't win. Surprised Froome didn't beat him.

stage 21

Tour de France 2017: Stages 8-14

Stage 8:

Monday Morning DS: Alright, I'll call you Jane.

stage 8

Stage 9:

Monday Morning DS: Another one bites the dust; Froome can win just by not crashing out.

stage 9

Stage 10:

Monday Morning DS: I'm weak as fuck right now. Should change my name to Greipel.

stage 10

Stage 11:

Monday Morning DS: Fuck Kittel.

stage 11

Stage 12:

Monday Morning DS: ROFL Froome got Froome-d by Landa.

stage 12

Stage 13:

Monday Morning DS: Haimar Zebeldia is still racing???

stage 13

Stage 14:

Monday Morning DS: LOL EBH third, can't make this shit up.

stage 14

There Was a Meeting About This

The questionable advertising concepts I’ve recently come across that were apparently approved by a group of people.

1.    Pocky Squeeze

I understand they’re trying to suggest that these Pocky snacks taste like freshly squeezed fruit juice, but these resemble ball sack sweat and, well, butt sex.

2.    Takara Showroom Commercial

The premise here is that, like using too much shampoo, many homes use too much space in building out their bathrooms, both of which are wasteful. I suppose this is trying to show that Takara Standard, a manufacturer of system baths and kitchens, can use this space more effectively. Unfortunately, this commercial is best described by the words of a friend, who called it “jizz city.”

3.    Zexy’s Online Matchmaking Site Logo

A group of people who are paid to brand things apparently decided that the image of a woman bending over would be a great logo for an online matchmaking service.

4.    Tyrrell’s Potato Chips

Of all the places they could have photoshopped in a giant, red, phallic object, it had to be in this guy’s lap. At that angle. 


5.    Maro Hair Products Commercial

Just in case you were wondering how racially insensitive Japan is.

Tour de France 2017: Stages 1-7

Another Tour, another year of collage postcards with quotes from the Monday Morning DS!

Stage 1:

Monday morning DS: RIP Valverde.

stage 1

Stage 2:

Monday morning DS: Wish Kittel had slipped in the rain.

stage 2

Stage 3:

Monday morning DS: From almost-nut-smasher to stage winner.

stage 3

Stage 4:

Monday morning DS: (on Sagan's DQ) Who's gonna come in fourth in sprints now?

stage 4

Stage 5:

Monday morning DS: Froome wins another Tour.

stage 5

Stage 6:

Monday morning DS: Bouhanni is a dick.

stage 6

Stage 7: 

Monday morning DS: Pre-Sagan replaced Sagan.

stage 7